Ashtyn took a 2 hour nap on my chest today and that means I had time for 2 things - catching up on sleep and reflection.
The infant I once knew is now a little girl and the weight of her body on my chest makes breathing a little more difficult - but the tradeoff is worth it. She talks in her sleep and I try to imagine the storyline of her dreams. Sweat and drool saturate my shirt and the rise and fall of her chest can be felt against mine.
How much longer will I get to enjoy this daily routine? I can’t believe there were days that I was resentful of these naps. Sometimes after falling asleep, she wouldn’t let me sneak away to get things done around the house, and I felt trapped - shame on me. Now that I understand how quickly she is growing up, I embrace every second and when she stirs in her sleep I pray for 5 more minutes.
She’s always beautiful, but the moments when she is asleep and just as she awakes are heavenly.
I never knew a love like this - until I became a father.